At an age where girls were thinking about parties and proms, crushes and clothes. I was a mother. I lead a somewhat sheltered life. I went to great schools and my dad made sure we lacked for nothing. When I found out I was pregant I did not bat an eyes to tell my parents. They were disappointed yes, but they stood by me as I made my decisions. I was going to keep my litle dream girl.
I had to put aside childish things and become responsible, I had another little life to take care of (Well not so little, she was 9lbs 3 0z when she was born). LOL
I stepped out on my own, I worked, I went to school and I travelled all the while my little girl was with me. I was not going to be another satistic, another blip on the screen. No matter where I was in the world. I was going to succeed, She was not going to lack for anything I made sure of it. and she never did. I had to be strong, if I wasn't who was going to be strong for her.
We experienced everything together, we smiled and laughed together thoughout the years. And as I sat yesterday looking at her it seemed as if 16 years went by in the blink of an eye. More than once she caught me looking at her with tears in my eyes rembering the little thing she was when she first started life. I played it all like a movie in my head.
Where ever I went, she did too. In all of the roads I have travelled her little hands were firmly in mine. Other hands have joined our since the jounney began. But hers were the first and now they have grown into the elgant hands of a young woman. Yesterday she told me that I was a kick ass mom. All the hard work I put into my books and my careers was for her and her brothers and sister. But hearing your oldest daughter tell you she was proud of you and how you raised her was validation enough for me.
So join me in saying Happy sweet sixteen to my baby girl. Who has become a wonderful young woman. Even now sometimes she crawls into bed with me. I can close my eyes and remember the tiny thing with the brillaint smile running on the beach in a diaper and high top sneakers because she was afrad of the sand. I inhaled the smell of coconut oil as I rubbed it in her hair before she went to bed. She slept on my chest as I braided her hair and went to sleep in her favorite Barney PJ's (She's going to hate that I told that...LOL). I love you Deanna and even when you are in your 30's you will still be my baby in high tops.
Deanna with her brilliant smile
Deanna and Mom
